Many people (including even myself sometimes) wouldn't believe that I've only ever been in two real relationships in my life. One was with Greg that spanned seven years starting from my days in the army when I was still struggling with coming out. The other is with my husband when I decided that it was best for me to find someone else due to the age difference especially when he hasn't decided to live his life as an open gay men and divorce his wife yet.
To be honest, leaving my first love wasn't my decision as much as my allowing the inevitability to unfold and eventually become the truth because that was not what I wanted at all. So much for happy endings right? As an aside, that made me more resolute in my unwavering search for an other half who will stay till the very end, pushing me towards the path of marriage with Ision.
For those seven years with Greg, I endured the pain of a long distance relationship. Granted that we got to meet a few times a year and the passion that erupted every meeting was always fiery, that was still an experience I don't wish for anyone. We all know that long distance relationships don't last and ours was no different of course. It either ends or ceases to be long distance.
Because of how deeply we felt about one another, I was gifted with memories that would last forever. In addition, those feelings of longing provided the best fuel and material for song-writing. This month's musical journey takes us back to that time, when we were separated perpetually by a three-hour time difference, when much of everyday was spent thinking of him, emailing him, calling him, and writing and singing about him. As our ultimate parting was totally amicable, I stayed friends with Greg till his passing. You can read more about my years with Greg here.
This song I'm sharing today is yet another one of me missing him after having spent a few days together and looking forward to seeing him again in a year's time. This song comes in two arrangements, namely the original one with a rock feel and the unplugged version, and you can listen to both below. Which one do you like better?
[明年的今早]
右手扯着我
一百八十分长的差错
不能逃脱
吞吐的画面
传不出爱的彩色
断续的信号
“我爱你” 被冷风吹散了
昨天的微笑
脑海依稀围绕
明天的拥抱
肌膚渴望能感觉到
太平洋的南边的你
另一边的我
靠着海水墙面我的耳朵
听你下落
时间的左手拉着你
右手扯着我
一百八十分长的差错
不能逃脱
吞吐的画面
传不出爱的彩色
断续的信号
“我爱你” 被冷风吹散了
今早一声好
给我力量等到
明年的今早
你手我能永远抓牢
太平洋的南边的你
另一边的我
靠着海水墙面我的耳朵
听你下落
没你我是否能不难过
[A Year from Now]
And its right hand tugging at me
The error of a three-hour time difference
Is something that cannot be avoided
The stuttering display
Unable to transmit the colour of love
The intermittent signal
Dissipates "I love you" to the wind
Yesterday's smile
Still vaguely in my memory
Tomorrow's embrace
Is something my skin yearns to feel
You are south of the Pacific Ocean
And I lie at the opposite end
With my ear held against that wall of water
I listen to your whereabouts
The left hand of time pulling at you
And its right hand tugging at me
The error of a three-hour time difference
Is something that cannot be avoided
The stuttering display
Unable to transmit the colour of love
The intermittent signal
Dissipates "I love you" to the wind
This morning's "hello"
Gives me the strength to wait
Till this morning of next year
When I can hold your hand tightly forever
You are south of the Pacific Ocean
And I lie at the opposite end
With my ear held against that wall of water
I listen to your whereabouts
Will I be able to not feel sad without you
