Jockstrap and gumboots anyone?

I have been really busy with work recently as I am in a project with an impossible scope and an impossible schedule. Fortunately I still get paid for all the overtime that I have been doing so at least it is not wasted hard work. This project will be handed over to the Lagos office in Nigeria at the end of the year, an office that is currently under-resourced and they are trying their best to encourage people to work there despite it being really unsafe. Every single attempt by management to sell Nigeria fails miserably, as they cannot even convince themselves of what they are saying. I am also working with Korean clients at the moment (sorry, none of them are cute) and I overheard one of them saying two of his engineer colleagues recently got kidnapped in Nigeria but the ransom was paid and it was business as usual the next day! How can anyone go there unless they desperately need the work experience (more than their lives)? They are not even paying that much more to draw people!

I am SO looking forward to my long break starting December for 6 weeks (that is when I will say bye-bye to that crazy project so there is definitely an end in sight, I think—the project deadline has been delayed a few times now so fingers crossed!). I have not really planned my year-end trip (like I usually would, down to the smallest detail) but I do have a rough idea. It will begin in Singapore and then a short tour of a nearby country with a friend (exact person still yet to be found) or by myself. Then it will be back to Singapore to show another Brisbane friend around for a few days followed by a 12-day virginal Japan trip (itinerary roughly fixed but nothing has been booked yet). Every thing is pretty much still in flux at this point, which is making me a little anxious. But like I said, work is keeping me pretty occupied now plus there might be an impending property-purchase (I will see how that pans out). Because of all this, my photo shoot and busking plans might have to be shelved for the moment, perhaps till next year when I am back from my vacation. This is exactly why a hobby remains just a hobby until you decide to pursue it full-time and it is only then can you really make something out of it.

So that is the update portion of this post done. As you might have already noticed, I always have a monthly musical post and a bi-monthly photo shoot entry on my blog. This month will be no different and I will be sharing pictures from a shoot I have done a few years back in Carriage Works, Sydney. Yes it is Carriage Works again—it is just too good a location not to use repeatedly! This series was originally meant to be published in a fund-raising calendar but plans later went awry. I gather that the calendar is never going to come into fruition at this point in time so why waste the pictures when I can post them here? The theme of the calendar was this tartan-like motif that every model must sport (I totally forgot what the fund-raising objective was). It was also the first time I had a shoot in jockstrap and gumboots. Interestingly the photographer is a Kiwi doctor who does this as a hobby. As he is very busy with his day job, he outsources his post-shoot editing. However those edits never surfaced and I had to do my own. A fair warning—it was a no-frills shoot from the start so don't expect too much!

Musical journey (39)

Melancholy especially in relation to affairs of the heart has always been inextricably-linked to music since human beings have started composing and this applies to me with no exception. When I was going through the long distance phase of relationships, I always tried to document my emotions right after I bade farewell. I made it a point to start writing from scratch after checking in at the airport and finish the song (lyrics and tune) before I touch down. I found this formula very useful because when the feelings are at their rawest state, the music is at its truest.

The song in this month's musical journey was written back in 2007 on the plane that was flying me back from Sydney. It was raining when we made our way to the train station but stopped when I checked in and this became the starting point of the writing journey. It is like writing a diary except the words are more lyrical and the emotions are summed up nicely in a three to four minute package. People respond more strongly to music than words on paper and this is why I feel composing emotions into song is far better than just writing words in a diary. More than six years have passed since this song was written and I can still tap into what went through my heart and mind back then. You guys should try this the next time an emotional episode comes up!



[爱]

词 / 曲 : 锦泉

湿答答的空气中   跑道累积的雨投映着 
我和你手牵手走在才刚下不久的雨中

空荡荡的脑海中   浮现着都是你的一举一动
刻在我的心为你痛
我从没这么爱过   没你日子怎能挨过

爱   是你赐给我这一生中最想实现的梦
如今捧在手中   仿佛还在作梦
爱   是我献给你我一生至死不移的承诺
言语不能形容  我庆幸你栖息在我生命中

再也等不及   说出那句 “我愿意”
等到我们双鬓白去   我仍在含着泪衷心感谢你



[Love]

Dankness fills the air
The rain puddles on the runway reflect the image of
You and I hand in hand walking in the rain
That fell not too long ago

Emptiness fills my head
Where scenes of your every move surface
Etching the heart that aches for you

I have never loved this way
How can I soldier through the days without you

Love is what you use
To fulfill the dream that I want realised the most
With it now in my hands
It still feels like a dream

Love is what I offer
As a steadfast promise till the day I die
Words cannot describe
How fortunate I am with you living in my life

I cannot wait any longer to say "I do"
When both our hair turns to snow
I know I will still have tears in my eyes
Thanking you from the bottom of my heart

Water is life

I have always thought that water and all its fluidity when captured in the right light using the right subject can really bring out the art in photography. Alas throughout my modelling career, I have done very little of this genre. I have had shoots by the sea and in the shower/bathtub but that is about it—there is nothing really big that stands out. That being said, I see this as a positive challenge, one that I require myself to be put in as many different artistic media as possible. Put in a rather cliche way, I sometimes see myself as a blank piece of canvas and a empty score sheet, waiting for the perfect touch and inspiration to fill in the details to transform something from unassuming to breathtaking. This is one of the reasons why I continue writing songs, performing and doing photo shoots.

Over the years, I have collected quite a few water-related pictures that I really wish one day I can do (ie. not only do but to do it as outstandingly as what you see in those pictures). In this post, I shall share with you a selection of these awesome shots in the hope that they would pique the interest of some good photographers willing to grant me my wish. Like I have said in an earlier post, nice spring weather is kicking in and it is high time I start getting another shoot together (I need to lose just a teeny bit of winter fat first). So the next thing to do is to get off my bum, hit the gym and then send out some casting calls!

L: I have used this pose of the shielding-hand, it is quite good

R: One of my dream shots (full-frontal is not the key)

 

L: The blueness is what I like (all comes down to editing)

R: I have done clear water but not milk (much sexier, don't you think?)

T: I almost had a chance to do this during the A-men shoot

B: Can I pull this off without being this cut?

L: A very DNA-esque shot (good translucent underwear is important)

R: Perfect lighting is the hardest thing to achieve here

L: This shot isn't too hard but it would require many takes

R: I need to do an entire series just like this

T: As an avid gym-goer, I'm surprised I've not done a gym-shoot before

B: Another dream shot of mine

 

L: I like how clever the placement of the falling water is

R: Couple-shoots in the shower and bedroom are always going to be fun

L: The water drapes over the subject like satin—just perfect

R: Dream shoot location alert! Natural waterfall!

L: First you need a private pool, then very good timing

R: I can totally imagine how free I'd feel if I were in that shot right now

So now after knowing what my photo shoot-equivalent of a porn fantasy is, which ones do you think I should aim to do next?

Musical journey (38)

As you may already know, I am searching for an instrumentalist to busk with and I think I might have found the ideal one. We have not had the chance to jam yet but I have a really good feeling about him. The first thing that sets him apart from the others is that he is gay which means that we will be able to get onto the right frequency very quickly, both personally and musically. A worthy point to note is that we did not get in contact via the ads I have placed on Gumtree or Craigslist asking for musicians to busk with but via a gay social/dating app by coincidence. Hence I cannot help but feel that we are truly destined to find each other in both our musical journeys. Alas he lives quite a fair bit of distance from the city which will make practice sessions quite painful for me.

The other thing that makes me feel good about him is that he already has the busking application forms ready and is familiar with the whole application procedure. This means that he is genuinely serious about wanting to busk which is really the key. There is a big difference between someone who is passionate about music and someone who is passionate about music AND performing, and I am searching for the latter. So wish me luck as I continue my quest of holding my first busking session in Melbourne. As work is getting really busy these days (which has caused me to postpone jamming sessions with another musician, the one I wrote about in my previous post), I hope I will have enough motivation and perseverance to see this through and not let it slip into the pile of forgotten dreams, like some of my other endeavours.

Now that you have been updated with the latest happenings in my musical life, it is time for me to show off a little of my singing prowess. People who have been to karaoke sessions with me know that I have never invited people to partner with me in duets as I always make it a point to sing both parts, regardless of gender. I must admit my ability to traverse between the musical ranges of both sexes does impress people quite easily even though having been equipped with that skill for so long, I do not think very highly of it. In this month's karaoke-clip musical journey, you will hear my rendition of a duet by two very powerful female singers (and gay icons) Barbra Streisand and Celine Dion. It is one of my favourite songs called "Tell Him". Do tell me what you think after listening to my very (but hopefully not overly) emotional take on it.

Shot in Brisbane (part 2)

Now that winter is taking its last breaths when it is more bearable being naked in the open, I hope I can do a shoot in the iconic Melbourne laneways, which is something I wanted to do ever since I stepped foot in this city. Even though I know it is tricky, a night shoot would be great as it will really capture the grungy essence. I will be sending casting calls on Model Mayhem soon asking for willing photographers to help me in that endeavour. By the way this is the site so many of you have asked me about regarding where I usually find my shoot opportunities. It is a great site for hobbyists like me to get the chance to work with great photographers. I originally wanted to join a model agency when I first came to Melbourne but quickly gave that idea up when I realised I lack the perseverance (and the goods) to become a semi-professional model. Thankfully sites like Model Mayhem and Modelrific exist to keep my modelling needs satiated and I don't have to go through the stress and anxiety of constant rejection in the real and cruel world of modelling.

Also, I have been seriously considering resuscitating The Nude Singer by recreating the Facebook page and adding back those people who 'liked' the site now that it has been close to two years since it died. It is no doubt going to involve some work maintaining that online image and popularity but to be shamelessly honest, I miss the never-ending adulation and attention I got from being The Nude Singer (which lived for only three months). That is certainly the best confidence-boost out there that is free of charge and so easily attainable. I will continue sleeping on that idea and see if the desire to rekindle the site grows. The idea of starting an Instagram account has also surfaced of late... All in good time I guess. While you indulge my indecision, hot on the heels of the first part of my latest series shot in the Brisbane CBD, I shall share with you the rest of the shoot (the first picture below has been featured in July's Out in Thailand magazine). Tuck in!

Shot in Brisbane (part 1)

As promised in my post last month when I was featured in Out in Thailand with my first-ever cover story, here is part one of my latest series shot in Brisbane that landed me the magazine's cover. The (professional) photographer was a straight (most importantly cute!) Iranian guy who specialises in weddings. He wanted to do something different and something that shouted Brisbane (a tall task in a boring city). I got quite distracted by his good looks when he first arrived without knowing his sexuality. As the night progressed and as I warmed up to him (the initial phase of a shoot where both parties try to find mutual chemistry is the hardest), I started to really enjoy myself because of how easy-going he was.

We began at a location that both displayed the Story Bridge prominently and was nice and quiet (as it was unknown to a lot of people—not that I would baulk an audience, hehe). We tried shots by the sea, under a platform, in the water, on a tree, by a little rowing boat and on a pedestal (that last one got to become the magazine cover). Then we moved on to another location that would again have the Story Bridge as the main character in the (erm...) story. We deliberately started just before dusk so we could capture both light and dark. When it became darker, we went to other more interesting spots including a dark alley, a church and the middle of a busy road. It was really fun posing right in traffic as cars from both sides kept honking (both out of annoyance and encouragement) whilst I had to stay still to achieve the desired long-exposure effect (one day I will realise my dream of doing it in the nude but for now this will do). Another notable experience was posing stark naked in front of a church (too bad it was locked...). Although I was a little disappointed the photographer did not send me any of the church full-frontals, I was still glad to receive some really nice shots.

In this series, I tried my hands at editing on a more serious level and came up with so many permutations that it was difficult to select which ones to post. I am still sharpening my editing skills as we speak and though an extremely laborious process, I am willing to continue polishing my techniques. Interspersed within the series are some of the photographer's edits and as he does mostly weddings, his editing is of a "grander" style whereas I prefer a more grungy feel—try to see if you can differentiate between us two. He told me that he had plans to put my picture in his shopfront which is something that I doubt but wouldn't it be super cool to accidentally bump into your blown-up shot as you cross the road? I wonder when my next Brisbane trip is...

So without further ado, I present part one of my latest series "Shot in Brisbane" and I will come back to satiate your appetites next week with part two. Enjoy the first course!

Oh, one more thing. I just found out yesterday that three of my full-frontals (hard) pictures from the other Brisbane shoot that I did have just been published in an online magazine that features only uber-hot naked guys and nothing else. By the way, I am one of two Asian models featured in the 200+ ad-free/clothing-free summer issue—super proud of myself and the photographer! The free censored version can be viewed online but you would have to give your credit card a mini workout if you want to see everything (nah, it is not that expensive). In my opinion, it is well worth it but who am I to sing my own praises?

Musical journey (37)

Last weekend I just had my first jamming session in Melbourne where a song was born at the end of the one-and-a-half-hour composing session. It was really a test of the song-writing skills I have picked up all these years (I started composing 17 years ago when I was 17. Gosh, am I old or what). I am so glad I came out of the test victorious and feeling good (it sure did feel like my jamming buddy whom I met for the first time was putting my skills to the test to see if I am good enough to front the punk rock band that he is trying to establish). It has been a while since I felt such raw creative vigour and I am sure this is the start of something special. The song we wrote will be polished further and posted here in the upcoming months. I am a perfectionist and so I will never post something that I am not totally happy with or something that I intend to continue working on.

So while waiting for this new song, let me share one that was written a while back. It is about me knowing that one day Ision and I would be living together for real (I know "not another whingey song about painful long distance relationships" must be the track running in your minds right now...). Even though all these songs were penned out of true personal stories, somehow I feel that this song is different from the rest. Perhaps it is the powerful words or perhaps it is their simplicity that make it stand out (plus I always give my songs bonus points when there is a key change). In any case, this is one of my favourites and I hope it will become one of yours too.


[One Day]

When space is as solid as a wall
When time stays the same spring to fall
When the ocean between us stands so tall
I can only dream, that is all

When two hearts have opened both their doors
When two minds have each other to explore
When two lives get intertwined at their cores
I don't want to dream anymore

One day the sun will rise above  
To shine a light for our love to burn
One day the miles will fade away 
So I can see your face every morning when I wake
I will find you and I a way
One day

When two hearts have opened both their doors
When two minds have each other to explore
When two lives get intertwined at their cores
I don't want to dream anymore

One day without a shadow of doubt
I'll be your lover, you'll show me how
One day together we will be
When I can lean on you can always count on me
To find you and I a way

One day when the fog clears I'll be ready
I've been waiting right here all along

One day the sun will rise above  
To shine a light for our love to burn
One day the miles will fade away 
So I can see your face every morning when I wake
I will find you and I a way

One day without a shadow of doubt
I'll be your lover, you'll show me how
One day together we will be
When I can lean on you can always count on me
To find you and I a way

One day
One day
One day

Out in Thailand

Whenever I am travelling in Thailand, I always find a particular magazine extremely useful as it has city maps with the locations of all the gay venues nicely marked up. Little do I know that one day I will be on it, and on the cover no less.

It all started when the magazine's editor discovered my pictures (that was a while ago and so I have forgotten how exactly did that happen). We then talked over the phone and he told me he was interested to put me on the cover. I got very excited but nothing happened for many months and I slowly gave up anticipating for it. Then one day in May, he suddenly sent me the interview questions and asked for a sample of my pictures that I would like to be considered for the cover and story. I answered the questions in as detailed and witty a manner and emailed him all of my pictures making sure that each photographer's name went along with the correct shot so they can be properly credited.

This is a small magazine (extremely handy to gay tourists nonetheless) without a huge budget so I do not expect to get paid for this (which should not be the case for major publications). To me, the chance to be the cover model of a magazine is enough reward for me. This cover preserves my beauty in its peak form and is something that lasts forever (or at least over my lifetime).

Two days ago the magazine finally went online and I quickly downloaded it into my phone (get your copy here and view the online article here). I did not read it straightaway as I wanted to relish it slowly. Although a huge part of the my interview answers were not used (the large font used in the article had a lot to do with it), the positive tone of the piece was really good—good enough to ignore the fact that a picture was wrongly credited. My sincere apologies to the photographer who took that stunning Bangkok picture in front of Siam Paragon. By the way the ad that took up half of the last page is pretty irksome as well. Also, I hope I get the hard copy I just requested from the editor, otherwise I would have to ask my biggest fan from Fridae living in Bangkok to send it to me.

The reason for keeping the name of the magazine a secret for quite some time was so that when it is finally revealed, the feeling will be all fresh and new. The picture they selected for the cover was from my most recent shoot—the one in which the photographer wanted to capture the essence of Brisbane (not an easy task seeing how bland the city is). Although I wish that another picture from the series were featured (the one on page 13), the one that was chosen in the end was still gorgeously-done. I will post the rest of the series soon (I am still waiting for the photographer to send over some more pictures from that shoot) but in the mean time enjoy these pages extracted from the magazine and give me your frankest opinion on this first in my life!