Saturday, May 7, 2016

Work it! (part 4)

OMFG! I know this is coming but I didn’t expect it to be so soon. Ision has just bought an apartment in Hawthorne and we will be moving into it at the end of next month or so (that is if there are no other competitors that can outbid him)! Now that I am my husband’s rent-paying tenant, will I be given the standard tenant rights I wonder? Jokes aside, it will be a stressful period for me as I will be facing both an impending joblessness and this move into a new place. They say things always happen either not at all or all at once and they are so right. Anyway I will worry about all that when I am back from my Singapore vacation in the first week of June and I will post the latest developments then.

OK, updates over. It’s now time for the next post in my workout series (the other posts are here: 1 2 3 5 6). I am very focussed in the gym and hence I always come across as anti-social when I’m working out (i.e. I can never be someone else’s gym buddy). I know that I should smile more as that’s basic cruising etiquette but like I said before, when I’m on the gym floor I have only one goal and that’s to get my routine done so I can go do other things Yes, you may be surprised to know that I don’t like to go to the gym. Who does?!

As a result of my being super focussed, one of my pet peeves is when I’m asked to spot someone else. In my opinion if you need a spotter, you’re doing it too heavy and I’m not going to subject myself to the risk of injuring you if something goes wrong during spotting. I wouldn’t ask someone to spot for me because I don’t want to put my life in the hands of a complete stranger. Another sign that people might be going too heavy is when they grunt and this is also another major pet peeve of mine. There are some people who just like to grunt to attract attention and they’re not even doing heavy weights! The worst is when females grunt and yes they do. I already hate it when hot men grunt, can you imagine how frustrating it is to hear women do it?

There’s also some rude behaviour that really pisses me off in the gym. For instance I detest people who work out in groups and then chat around a machine, hogging it in the process. If you want to socialise go to a pub because a gym is not the place to do it. Some people also play with their phones in between sets on the machine but nothing is worse than the time when I saw a person reading the newspaper on a machine! Simply outrageous! Another way people are impolite in the gym is when they have body odour. Maintaining basic hygiene is everyone’s duty especially when you’re in a public space. Subjecting people to BO is plain rude. However there’s really no solution to this problem and we just have to execute perfect breath-timing when these smelly people walk past (I am an expert now that I've been in Papua New Guinea for a while).

Well whingeing is not going to solve any of the above problems and I guess these pet peeves will remain forever as long as I can’t afford my own private gym. To thank you guys for putting up with my whining I’m now going to share two short workout videos. These clips feature the chest and biceps, the two major muscle groups everyone must train in order to look impressive in tight-fitting clothes, which I do!




Chris said...

I worked out at an all-male gay gym for years, and really enjoyed it. I only stopped when my foot problems became so annoying that I couldn't work out at all. Warning: this was supposed to only be a few paragraphs, but as I wrote I thought of more and more stupid things I've seen happen in my gym.

I agree with some of your comments. About body odour, for example. There was a guy there whose foot odour was so evident that he had to be barred from the gym. Tip: always wear clean socks with your trainers in the gym, and don't wear flip-flops, sandals, or go barefoot. Great way to have a foot injury if someone drops a weight on them or steps on them, and the socks wick up the sweat so it leaves the trainer on the sock and doesn't collect in the trainer. Another guy wore the same singlet every time he went to the gym, and he didn't wash it in between. He was barred too.

I blame the floor staff for not releasing a machine promptly. They should be looking out for groups blocking a machine and gently suggest that the group move on.

Every gym member should go around with a towel, and clean off every machine that they use. And don't wear patchouli or another strong cologne when using the delt machine. The perfume comes off your face and congregates on the machine and it's not pleasant.

Grunting I'm kind of OK with; sometimes it gives someone that extra oomph that allows them to complete a set. If they grunt on every lift, and sound like they're in pain, that's not good. What pisses me off is these pinheads who complete a set then drop the dumbbells on the floor very hard. They need to be admonished. They normally don't put the dumbbells back on the rack, either.

And then there are the super-pinheads who load up a leg machine with 200 kg on each side, do their reps (bravo to them!) and then leave 10 20kg plates on each side for someone else who only does 40kg to remove and replace. I love them! Someone should put a laxative in their protein shakes.

And then, in the shower, there are the guys who are too coy to remove their jocks to wash themselves. Don't be silly. If you're shy go home and shower. There are the guys who j/o in the shower too...while some might be turned on by this who wants to step into a shower where someone has just creamed all over the floor. In my gym, the owner used to have to use strong chemicals in the shower drains because of the deposits of urine, feces, and cum that would regularly block it up.

Oh, and if you get too turned on and want to take it further with a guy, don't monopolise a toilet stall. It's embarrassing to hear you slurping all over him. Bring him home for that.

If you dry your pubes with the hair dryer, make sure you keep it far far away from your crotch. I don't want your public hairs as highlights in my hairdo.

Don't steal the product--it's there for everyone to use, not to stock your bathroom cabinet.

When you're in the sauna, for goodness' sake don't lie down on the entire bench, especially the top bench. And sit on your towel, please. I don't want to sit on your wet spot on the bench, thanks. Don't pour more water on the stones without asking everyone else in the sauna whether you can.

That's enough for starters. The main request is: be courteous, and treat other exercisers as you would like to be treated.

Kim said...

Haha Chris. That's a really amusing and informative read. Thanks for the long reply - my longest comment yet on this blog!

Wow, an all-male gay gym - there must be lots of action! So how can you blame people for leaving cum and stuff on the floor! They cannot help it! And I bet you will like it if I pissed on myself in front of you in the shower (or even pissed on you) so I guess the gym will have to continue using the strong chemicals!

Plus I like to get it on in public so I would tend to continue in the gym and get a complete release and finish the act there and then. But I will use the steam room or a shower cubicle and not the toilet stall. There are more shower cubicles than toilet stalls so I guess that is OK.

One of my pet peeves that I did not mention in the post is when friends go to the steam room or sauna together and chat with each other incessantly. In such small spaces meant for people to relax, there should really be a sign that says "no talking" because it's really unpleasant.

To date I have never seen gym staff asking people to move on if they are hogging machines - I think they operate only if there are complaints. They don't even stop people from only wearing slippers and flip flops while using weights!

To be honest, I am guilty of some of the things you said. For example, not putting weights back sometimes. Well they are already strewn all over the floor to begin with when I picked them up to use. I am not employed by the gym to put everything back so after I am done with them, if I can't be bothered, I will simply leave them where I found them. Personal trainers don't even put weights back and they are employed by the gym so why must I do it?

I also once dropped weights on the floor and underestimated the bounce caused by the thick rubber mats and one dumbbell bounced all the way to the mirror and smashed it! That was a major lesson learnt for me.

Not many gyms have a "no grunting" sign. In fact I only saw them in America and never once in Australia. I think the sign should be up in every gym.

I have never dried my pubes with a hairdryer and frankly I don't understand why people do it. And I also don't understand why people shower with something on or when they change into their underwear after a shower with a towel wrapped around them or when they don't go completely naked in the steam room or sauna. I guess not everyone is as exhibitionistic as me.

Looks like my reply is also getting longer than planned! This is a really good topic!

Chris said...

Well, I should start off by saying that the gym closed (after 20 years) because the trend here is for low-cost 24-hour minimally-staffed gyms, and they couldn't compete. It's sad, but that's where the market here is going.

I look on the gym as a place to work out. I am not interested in having sex at the gym, in general (I did it once, and once only). It's not comfortable, and there are lots of saunas in town (in fact, there's one just down the street from this gym) and I found them much more congenial as far as sex is concerned. I know this might not be a universally-popular view, but what can I say? If the gym were coed, there might be less testosterone sloshing around and less sexual activity.

The gym had a gang shower, not cubicles. So when you were showering you were doing it in full sight of everyone in the shower and some in the changing rooms. There was no steam room, only a sauna. There wasn't much chatter there.

The gym had a strict clothing policy: no barefoot, slippers, flipflops, or shirtless working-out.

One thing that I forgot to mention was the time I was lying on the floor stretching, next to a weight bench. A clueless idiot was lifting on the bench, but he hadn't put the chocks on the weight bar to keep the plates in place. He lost control of the bar, tilted it, and a 20-kg plate slipped off and nearly got me in the head.

As for putting weights back, I have to gently disagree. I wouldn't say that people have an obligation to put weights they haven't used back on the racks (some people do tidy up after other people, and that's altruistic but time-consuming) but if one uses weights it would be kinder to replace the ones one has used on the rack. That's what I did.

Hm. No grunting signs. There wasn't one in the gym I went to. There were a couple of pinheads who would shout and roar when going for that last lift of a set. They were spoken to.

I agree, it's a very good topic. Lots of gay men go to or went to gyms.

Oh, and fat shaming is rife in gyms. People ought to stop it. If someone has the gumption to go to the gym and try to improve their health, they should be praised for it.

Kim said...

Yeah, the 24/7 gym fad is here in Australia too and has been popular for a while now. They are also actively inducting more franchisees to open more branches using this operating structure.

I like to do it in the gym where possible because of the thrill factor (as opposed to it being too "obvious" in a gay sauna setting). I guess you don't like public sex as much as me.

Wow. Gang shower. Perfect place for exhibiting myself getting it on!!!

As for clothing policy, it's pretty standard across all gyms i.e. it is in their conditions of entry/usage but some gyms enforce it better than others. I guess it depends on whether or not the gym has been sued because of injuries sustained due to say improper footwear.

Always avoid the line of fire and stay clear (assume everyone is an idiot) - the 20kg weight plate episode is pretty scary. That being said, the imbalance-resulting-in-weights-falling-off thing has happened to me before as I was too lazy to put in the chocks. Hehe. It was quite embarrassing though so that was the last time it happened.

Yeah, I agree with putting the weights back. It's just harder to do when everyone around you is not doing it!

At least the grunters were spoken to. I have never seen someone being approached for grunting. That would be awesome to witness.

Fat-shaming is bad but I have never seen it play out in the gym itself. In that regard, cruising in a gay sauna is worse and is the cruellest place on earth because fat-shaming is everywhere by simply having their advances rejected. In what form has fat-shaming manifested in front of you in the gym?

Good topic indeed!

Chris said...

The few people who were caught having sex publicly in that gym were immediately banned. The owners were not interested in having a venue for that; they were serious bodybuilders and wanted to have a gym that catered to serious bodybuilders.So you would have had a pretty difficult time being promiscuous and public there.

There was an older guy at the gym who was quite a bit heavier than I was. Some of the more serious bodybuilders there were laughing at him and making remarks. The owners banned them right away.

Kim said...

Ah I see. I was once invited by someone to go to a 24/7 gym late at night to have public fun in side. I was VERY tempted but also think there'd be CCTV cameras so I decided not to go in the end.

Looks like the owners of your gym were pretty strict. You don't see that nowadays especially when major franchises are desperate to gain and keep up membership.